The Pawns Keep Crawling off the Board

The game of chess has been played for millennia. A relatively recent way to play is by correspondence. Two contestants in different locations transmit their next move via e-mail or letters. Interestingly enough, each player starts with eight pawns. I mean seriously, this metaphor just writes itself…

by midnightglory

by midnightglory

The following was sent to six TLC executives from an e-mail address set up under the name Jon Gosselin:

Dear: (TLC executive name)

Attn: Please forward to Kate

Well done indeed! Your last gambol isolated the king and kept him out of play. However, I still have a few tricks up my sleeve. I withdraw my castle, leaving the queen high and dry. And, I still have eigth pawns, which I will leave precisely where they are now: way out in front. They’re at great risk, but they certainly make good bargaining chips, don’t they?

I can’t wait to see your next move.


Jon Gosselin

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About Brian

Brian is a retired drill-press operator who lives voluntarily off the grid in a cabin in Montana. He has apparently been sending fake letters to businesses and prominent citizens for decades, as a hobby. We became aware of him when he sent us an envelope filled with white powder and some uncooked alphabet soup letters that spelled ‘ANTHRAX”. We spent over $100,000 sanitizing our offices and testing the staff before labs identified the substance as baking soda. We thought it was hilarious and asked him if we could publish his outgoing mail.